During my adolescent years, I had experienced a significant amount of abuse. Some abuse was verbal (teasing/taunting), emotional (psychological), physical, and sexual. However, by the time I was about 16 years old, the seeds of abuse began to manifest, and I began to fight back.
Fighting back took form in the realms of guilt, shame, promiscuity, anger/rage, confusion, anxiety, and running away. I had learned how to survive in the jungle of life, and I wore my invisible fatigue clothes, prepared for any battle that came my way. I was a master of survival, but living was foreign to me.
When the seeds of abuse came to full harvest, I had mastered the art of pretending, and my true self was hidden. After all, my true self did not get the love, or respect, I so desperately needed. So, I learned how to adapt to people, places, and things like a Chameleon.
The most unfortunate part, when I began to fight back, irresponsibly displaying all the pain that had occurred in my early years, those that sowed the abuse in the first place took on a prideful disposition of “I told you so.” This insidious form of evil is heart wrenching on the human soul, and diabolical. This disposition of pride suggests its ok to judge, and be critical, because after all, “I’m better than you.”
Adding insult to injury is when the abuser plays the victim, which strengthens the abuse. Always remember, the art of psychological abuse is when the abuser plays the victim.
What I have also learned, It doesn’t matter how respectful, nice, or kind you are, if you are around evil long enough, it will affect you.
The Bible makes it very clear; Evil communications corrupt good manners (I Corinthians 15:33).
Another form of psychological abuse I would like to discuss is when an individual wants you to pay for something that life has taken away from them. Have you ever met someone that wanted you to reap back something that you did not sow? You showed up to the table with fruit, flowers, and candy, and in return the person gives you water with cyanide. I now recognize, a lot of my most challenging relationships came from people that had unresolved issues from their past, and they wanted me to pay for it.
This type of psychological warfare is dangerous….
There is absolutely no one that can pay you back for what life has stolen from you, but God.
Also consider, any time that you have been on the battle field a long time, fighting to be heard, fighting to be loved, fighting to be valued, fighting to be recognized, fighting to be understood, and just simply fighting yourself, when you come to yourself, and your self perception changes, don’t expect those that have watched your personal warfare, jump on the boat with you called peace and surrender.
Most times they will be suspicious and afraid of you. If you stick around hoping for support from this group, you may be setting yourself up for more hurt, rejection, and psychological abuse. In this brief discussion about psychological abuse, always remember that God does not want us to live in fear, but to have POWER, LOVE, and SOUND MIND (II Timothy 1:7).